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My First Job…

October 5, 2012

So, Summer began as any other, with work at the barbecue pit near my house. I’ve been there eight years, this was my ninth and I LOVED it. I just graduated in May and came home figuring, ‘okay, I have income at least, so I can work on finding a job at my own pace.’

Well, let me tell you something.

I came home to my familiar job with my familiar coworkers and my familiar daily tasks, except one thing… I received a promotion. GREAT except… now I am above all of my peers and I have no idea how to do that. So, summer actually began with a substantial pay raise, complete alienation from my friends, and utter cluelessness of how to perform my job, PLUS the lack of my manager’s presence (hence the promotion) to mentor me in the position. AND, let’s not forget the fact that my new job also contains new hours (a grand total of 50-60 hours per week). There goes all my free time to job hunt.

What do I do now?

The Job Hunt Begins…

I used resume websites, where you post your resume and people blow up your phone trying to get hold of you, only to tell you that they have found other “more qualified” candidates. Let’s not forget the ones who never call, either. There are a lot of those around. I also checked the newspaper about once a week. The most valuable resource I was told I had in college, though, was my NETWORK. That is a magical word; if the circumstances are appropriate. Mine weren’t.

The problem with having a useful network (for me) is that the network is NOT located anywhere even remotely close to my residence. This poses a problem. I will not bore you with details, so let’s move on.

First Apartment?

There is a lot of home related stress in my life right now. So, I figured the best way to combat that stress was to remove myself from the situation. Great idea, right? Sure it is; if you have the money to do so, which I don’t. I asked around and found a real gem. My boss owns several properties and one of them is currently empty. He offered that house to me at a steal for rent. The deal is unbelievable, if I can come up with the rent payment. I am so psyched about this house, I cannot wait to move in! But, here we are back to the ‘need a job’ part of life.

Back to Job-Hunting

I made a list of companies I would absolutely LOVE to work for and started with them for employment. After approximately 4 weeks, one of them called me for an interview! I got to the second round interview and was told afterwards that the company had selected a better qualified candidate. No big deal. I interviewed for another position with the same company and got to the second round with them, as well. Again, the better qualified candidate out swung me. I began to feel depressed and like I wasn’t good enough; like no one wanted me.

Then, another company called. They had found my resume online and had a job fair coming up. They asked if I would attend to speak with their hiring staff. I did and they pursued me through employment. I was so happy, I had finally found a job and a company that wanted my talents on their workforce. The pay was great, the company was fantastic…the drive was almost an hour. And, gas was going up.

I will be brief. My employment was desirable, but I refused to discontinue my employment at the barbecue pit. So, here I am putting in 40 hours for the new company and nearly 30 every Saturday and Sunday for the barbecue. I began to get sick. On the second day of employment, I called in sick because the migraine I had was so unbearable I could not even dial the phone because the light and sound hurt so much. I thought I would stick it out, and then when I realized that I would make two paychecks per month and one of them would go to my gas tank; I decided I was done.

DEPRESSION. I had a job and couldn’t even stay there. I kept asking myself, “Who did I let down? Was it them, or was it me?”


Maybe it was a mistake to jump on the first job that wanted me. Maybe I didn’t think it all the way through. I had to have known about the drive, I had made the trip at least 4 times throughout the interview process and told them I had no problem with the conditions of employment.

Maybe I was so worried that no one wanted me due to the repeated rejection that I wasn’t thinking clearly when something finally came up.

Maybe a lot of things; BUT, my health comes first and when my body starts to tell me something is wrong, usually it means that my mind is already far past normally stressed.


My goals are to stay focused and to find a job. I cannot be particularly picky at this point in my career, but there are certain things I must be aware of constantly. My body and mind will tell me if something is wrong and I need to trust myself to see those signs before something bad happens as a result.


Stay focused on the end point

Be cognizant of all factors, not just the paycheck or the opportunity

Trust yourself; something will come up that is right for you; be patient

Thanks so much for reading. I continue my job search and have another interview coming up. I also have scheduled myself for a few open houses and job fairs in the coming month. As long as you remain positive, anything is possible.


From → Self Reflection

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